2012 Chernobyl Diaries

• Directed by Bradley Parker
• Written by Oren Peli, Carey Van Dyke, Shane Van Dyke
• Stars Jesse McCartney, Jonathan Sadowski, Olivia Taylor Dudley
• Run Time: 1 Hour, 26 Minutes
• Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pq47T48u8Zo

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

The formula this one follows is fairly predictable, but it moves nicely and it’s well made. The cast is believable, the script pretty good though it’s a little rushed at the end, and the effects get the job done. We’d call it about a seven out of ten.

Spoilery Synopsis

We open with “found footage” of a bunch of young people vacationing in Europe. Natalie, Amanda, Chris, and Paul record all their travels. Chris plans to propose to Amanda sometime during the trip. Credits roll. 

The group almost gets into a fight with a bunch of Russians on the road. Instead of Moscow, they decide to go to Chernobyl instead– Paul knows a guy, Uri, who is into “extreme tourism.” There’s an abandoned town that’s still there, and it’d be really cool for a photo shoot. The radiation won’t hurt them for just one day. 

In the morning they go to Uri’s travel agency, and Uri explains to Paul all about the planned trip. Two other people, Michael and Zoe, join the group as they board an old bus. On the drive, Uri explains what happened at Chernobyl. “Nature has reclaimed its rightful home,” he translates. 

They arrive at a checkpoint, and Uri says “Let me do the talking. Put your cameras away.” It’s all very secure looking, and Uri says they won’t let them in today– maintenance or something. Uri seems confused, but he says there’s more than one way. They go in through a back road, and it all looks a bit sketchy now. 

They pause to look at the abandoned city and then stop at a pond. They see weird, dead, mutant fish. They drive into town next, and Uri says the radiation has only recently died down enough to be here. They park and walk around the empty buildings. It’s quiet with no birds or animals. 

They go inside one of the apartment buildings. Uri sees some poop on the ground and stealthily pushes it aside. Then they hear movement downstairs. Uri goes to investigate and a huge bear charges through. They all hightail it back to the van. Uri’s seen dogs and wolves, but never a bear before. 

The van won’t start. The wiring in the engine has been wrecked but they’re supposed to be there alone. Uri tries to call for help on his radio, but there’s no answer… as night falls. The tourists all start arguing. Uri wants to spend the night in the van and walk out in the morning. 

Zoe and Michael are hikers and suggest walking out, but Uri says not at night. Then they all hear sounds outside that sounds like a baby. Uri pulls a gun out of the glove compartment and investigates as Chris follows. Shots are fired in the dark, and Chris comes back to the van injured. “There were a lot of them,” he screams. “They got Uri!” 

In the morning, Uri hasn’t come back, Chris can’t walk, and Michael says he can’t fix the van. Michael, Paul, and Amanda go out to look for Uri, and they talk about whatever attacked Chris. They find Uri’s radio just outside the entrance to an underground bunker. 

They eventually find Uri’s body and his geiger counter, but they also find something else. The guys run out, leaving Amanda inside with the thing that’s been eating him. She gets out without getting a good look at the creature. 

Back at the van, Chris and Natalie stay in the van, since he can’t walk. The others set off on foot to walk out and get help. They soon find a parking lot full of cars. Maybe they can find parts to fix the van? 

They get the parts but then get chased by wild dogs. To get away, they cross a rotten bridge and everyone gets soaked in irradiated water. Michael gets a cut on his leg as well. The sun goes down before they can get back to the van, but they have trouble finding the van– and no one answers on the radio. 

They find the van, upside-down with no one inside. They find Natalie’s phone, with a recording. It’s all blurry and chaotic, but something gets them. Paul runs off screaming into the dark, which is going to attract things. They find Natlie in a nearby building, but she’s in shock. 

Everyone wants to leave except Paul, who refuses to leave his brother behind. They eventually convince him, but they don’t get far before they see a child, all alone in the dark. As they walk toward the child, something else grabs Natalie. As they run through the dark, they see a lot of people coming out of the buildings. As they run, the people grab Michael and pull him away. 

Amanda, Paul, and Zoe walk through tunnels in the dark. It doesn’t take long for the mutants to grab Zoe as well. The radiation picks up, and Paul complains about his vision getting blurry. They walk right up to the Chernobyl reactor itself, where they see lights and soldiers. The soldiers shoot Paul and take Amanda into custody. 

“She’s seen them. We can’t let her go,” says one of the scientists at the hospital they take her to. They throw her in a dark cell. They also talk about patients who have escaped. Turns out, the cell is full of mutants who kill her. 

Brian’s Commentary

What do all those mutants eat? 

Most of the tourists have cameras, but it’s not really a found footage film for most of the run (although there are parts). This is one of those films where most of the tension comes from everyone screaming over each other all the time. 

This was shot in Hungary and Serbia, not really Chernobyl. Still, the abandoned town and buildings are obviously real and very atmospheric. 

The ending felt rushed and wasn’t explained enough, but the rest of the movie was pretty good. 

Kevin’s Commentary

I didn’t think there were a lot of surprises. It was a matter of watching things flow and seeing who gets picked off next, and if there are any survivors at the end. It was well made, except for an ending that was a bit rushed, and I enjoyed it.